Day 16 — A song that makes you cry (or nearly)

Songs don't typically make me cry. They're only on average like 3 or 4 minutes long, and most of the time they're just playing in the background as I go about my day. The only times I will cry as a result of a song is if the lyrics really relate to some hardship that I am currently going through at that point of time in my life. That's not too too often, I'm glad to say.

Books and movies now, though, I am far more likely to cry for. Movies last two hours, books usually even longer (probably a week at least for me). This gives me time to get attached to the characters, relate to their situations, and feel for them if something bad happens. The book I've cried hardest upon finishing it was My Sister's Keeper. The movie definitely did not do it any justice at all; I mean, I cried at the end of the movie, but I was outright bawling when I finished the book.

The movie I've cried hardest during was definitely The Passion of Christ. I don't cry when I read about Jesus' crucifixion in the bible, though.. this isn't to say that the movie was better than the book in this case, you can't really compare the Bible to any movie because duh, it's God's word and that surpasses anything earthly of course. But I don't know, somehow seeing the events play out on the screen made the story more.. not necessarily more real, but more tangible, to me. I've more thoughts on this subject, but that's really all I've got to say about that for now.

Day 15 — A fanfic

So I don't typically read any fanfictions (I think I read some when I went through a Backstreet Boys phase in middle school, and I read one that someone had written as though Disney Channel's Phil of the Future were made into a movie), but this one is Samm's Twilight fanfic for Jacob: http://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/notes/samantha-kenney/twilight-its-jacobs-turn/238249255040. I don't know if the link would work for anyone who's not her friend on Facebook, but it's pretty much the only one I've read in recent years, and I like it! Samm, you need to write moooore, please :P

Day 14 — A non-fictional book

The Bible.

"Turn it Off" - Paramore

I scraped my knees while I was praying, and found a demon in my safest haven, seems like it's getting harder to believe in anything than just to get lost in all my selfish thoughts.

I wanna know what it'd be like to find perfection in my pride, to see nothing in the light.

I'll turn it off in all my spite;

In all my spite, I'll turn it off. 

And the worst part is before it gets any better, we're headed for a cliff.

And in the free fall, I will realize I'm better off when I hit the bottom.

The tragedy, it seems unending.

I'm watching everyone I looked up to break and bending.

We're taking shortcuts and false solutions just to come out the hero.

Well, I can see behind the curtain; the wheels are cranking, turning.

It's all wrong, the way we're working towards a goal that's non-existent. 

It's not existent, but we just keep believing.

And the worst part is before it gets any better, we're headed for a cliff.

And in the free fall, I will realize I'm better off when I hit the bottom.

I wanna know what it'd be like to find perfection in my pride, to see nothing in the light.

I'll turn it off in all my spite;

In all my spite, I'll turn it off.

And the worst part is before it gets any better, we're headed for a cliff.

And in the free fall, I will realize I'm better off when I hit the bottom.

And the worst part is before it gets any better, we're headed for a cliff.

And in the free fall, I will realize I'm better off when I hit the bottom.

___________________________________

Well, maybe I know somewhere, deep in my soul, that love never lasts. And we've got to find other ways to make it alone or keep a straight face..

I'm not giving up.

Day 13 — A fictional book

Yesterday, I finished my first book of the summer: The Lucky One, by Nicholas Sparks. I love his books, and I am slowly but surely making my way through reading all of them. :) While The Lucky One was pretty good and definitely had me on the edge of my seat (I read probably somewhere between 1/2 to 2/3 of it yesterday in one sitting until I finished it), had me laughing out loud, and reading as fast as I could to find out if one of the characters died only to be relieved that he was okay.. The Guardian is definitely still my favorite out of the Nicholas Sparks books I've read so far.

This one so far I have found the most memorable and the most touching. It would have been even more so if someone hadn't spoiled it for me when I was reading it for the first time in high school... I remember standing outside the school one morning leaning against the brick wall waiting for them to let us inside at like 750am or whatever, and one of my classmates comes up to me and is like "Isn't that the one where this happens?" I'm not going to spoil it for those of you that haven't read it, but I obviously hadn't read up to that part yet. But yes, this is the one where that happens. I don't know if I would've seen it coming anyway if he hadn't spoiled it, but still. I was pretty peeved.

Nevertheless, this is still an amazing book and if you haven't read it, I highly recommend it :)

I love reading. I've always been a bookworm, and I'm so glad now that it's summer because that means I'll probably actually get to do more leisure reading. I already have two other Nicholas Sparks books borrowed from the library, I have a book by Sarah Dessen that I bought months back but haven't managed to crack open, I still need to read Dan Brown's latest book, and I'm still in the middle of the Left Behind series. I actually have a Books to Read file on my computer so I can make note of books I've seen that sound interesting, and if ever I'm actually unsure of what to read next, I can consult my list. I'm a big fan of lists ;P

I love getting lost in a good book, and the books are pretty much definitely always better than the movies. :)

Grades!

Our spring semester grades were posted today, and guess what??





I GOT STRAIGHT A'S! :D

I don't mean to brag or anything like that, but I'm just really proud of myself. :) There were a couple of classes where I really wasn't sure I could do it, so I was figuring I'd get a B, which still would have been good, but this is awesome! This was the one semester where I overloaded on upper level classes, the most rigorous, time-consuming, and challenging semester of my life, and so it is such a reward to see those 5 glorious A's all lined up all in a neat column, untainted by an A- or any B's. This is seriously the first semester I've had in college where I got straight A's, and I am absolutely ecstatic. All that hard work has paid off. :)

Candlelight.

Tonight, I went to the candlelight vigil for Taylor Hubbard at Great Mills High School. It was truly amazing. It was simply and beautifully done. So many people, each with their own candle, in my opinion representing the light that Taylor was in their life. Even though I didn't know him well at all, I considered him a friend and it was great hearing all the stories and memories that his closer friends shared. I shed a good many tears, and my heart went out to all of those that were fortunate enough to be close to Taylor. It broke my heart when his dad went up at the end, holding his mom close, the both of them trembling, voice breaking, thanking everyone for being there. I continue to pray for Taylor's family and friends. Although he is in a better place now, it is still hard to see someone so special go.

It certainly was sad, but I felt that as memory after fond memory was shared, the night took on a more joyous note. Yes, we mourn Taylor's death, but moreso we celebrate his life and rejoice in the joy and love he spread to each and every one of the many people he met during his lifetime. My feeling at the end of the two hours tonight was that Taylor's light that we are familiar with is still shining as bright as ever.

It is not up to us to understand God's plans; we must simply trust in them and trust in Him. I like to think that maybe the Lord has plans for Taylor that are bigger even than anything he could have done here on earth.

(Proverbs 3:5) Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;

(Jeremiah 29:11) "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

RIP Taylor..

I've known people before that died, but it didn't really hit me until today - that awful realization that those people I used to see around and talk to are gone. It's awful, I know, that I didn't really feel anything for those other people, but today, I lost a friend. Not someone I just knew by name or face, but someone I had actually talked to, hugged, laughed with, and played wicked fast games of ERS with.. I didn't really know him that well at all, but I wish I had. I had physics with him my senior year of high school, and let me tell you, he was one cool kid. He was smart, always smiling, and an all-around fun-loving guy.

My heart goes out to his family and best friends.. I can't imagine the devastation I would feel if something happened to someone I loved that much..

The day this picture was taken, I was crying because it was my last day of high school ever, and I was sad that I wouldn't be seeing all the cool people I hung out with there much anymore. Today, I cried because now nobody will get to see and hang out with the wonderful person that is Taylor Hubbard anymore..

Lord, I trust that you have your reasons for taking him and that he is in a better place now. I'm thankful that I was at least able to call Taylor a friend for the short time that I knew him in high school. Please take care of him, as well as his family and friends.

Rest in peace, Taylor Hubbard <3

Day 12 — Whatever tickles your fancy

SUMMER 2010 IS HERE!

Well, it has been here for like four and a half days now, but I've been pretty busy actually. It doesn't quite feel like it really is summer just yet, probably because I've still been on campus every day for work. Probably next week when I take a day to just sleep, lounge around in my jammies all day and do absolutely nothing, it'll start to sink in :)

This summer, since I'm not going to be working as much as I usually do, I want to take some time to make some personal improvements in my life - things that I should or want to make a more regular part of my day to day living:

Summer Want-to-do's:

• Cook!
  Cooking is definitely a necessary life skill. Kirsten & Jessica are gonna help me out on this one :)
• Exercise!
  ...Definitely would be good to pick up on this now before all the junk I eat catches up to me later in life, haha. I'm thinking of investing in a WiiFit since I had such a blast with Jessica's XD
• Play piano
  I played again one night a couple weeks ago, & I do kind of miss it. I really enjoy being able to play, it's just a matter of practicing, which is what gets me, because it sometimes starts to feel like a chore. That, and I am awful at keeping the tempo. I still think it'd be nice to pick back up though, especially since I'm the only one in the fam that plays, so it'd be good to give the piano some use.
• I can't remember what else belongs on this list right now. That's okay. Time for sleep I guess :) Going to SMCM's graduation tomorrow to see some of my friends graduate, and then another day of work. 

CONGRATULATIONS SMCM CLASS OF 2010! :D

Day 11 — A photo of you taken recently

I recently brought the bangs back. Haven't had em probably since I was as little as I was in the picture in my last post :P Here are some pictures of me being silly & playing around with my newish look the day I got my hair did :)

Day 10 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago

Me at like 3 years old in my awesome room with awesome decorations. :P

Day 09 — A photo you took

<3

My mommy & daddy are still young and in love :)

Day 07 & 08 — A photo that makes you happy/A photo that makes you angry/sad

This photo makes me happy because I have been blessed with truly wonderful people that I can call my best friends. It also makes me kind of sad because we don't see each other and get to hang out like this anywhere near as often as we used to.

I hope we never forget what our friendship means to each other. <3

Day 06 — Whatever tickles your fancy

Confidence.

I have a good number of friends and people that I admire because of this quality. I want to have more of it. I want to not care so much about what everyone else thinks of me, and just do what I do because I want to, and I love to, and it feels right. I'm inspired by the confidence, strength, faith, and utter joy that I see in other people in the way they live their lives.

This applies to some little things, like how I dress (I want to be more fashionable and stylish and be bolder in my look; not radical or anything, but I want to be able to wear something that I think is cute and not care so much whether my opinion is shared with anybody else)  or the way I act (sometimes I want to just go crazy and have fun even if I look like a fool. My sister is the one who has seen the goofiest, silliest, most retarded side of me, and that is because she is my little sister; I know she looks up to me and won't judge me. Even around my closest friends, I kind of limit my craziness because I'm self-conscious and I always try to make sure I look 'cute').

It also applies to bigger things, like my faith. I'm still trying to build up a strong relationship with Christ, but first I have to be sure on my basic core beliefs. My brain knows what I need to believe and what I need to do, but it hasn't quite reached my heart. I want to have the kind of faith that I see in some people around me. I want to see God in every aspect of my life, and I want to be able to share that joy with the whole world the way other people's faith inspires me.

Really, it just applies to my whole life in general. I want to be an independent, strong, confident woman. I've been learning a lot about myself and who I want to and am supposed to be, but I'm still heavily influenced by the people around me and their opinions. I want to just be me, and be confident in the way I live my life, my opinions, and pretty much just be sure of myself.