GOAL(S)!

11pm & i'm just about to head to bed to catch some shuteye before i take two of my finals tomorrow. i sure hope i'm prepared enough! my studying kind of diminished as i got to the end & my brain cells decided they were exhausted or something.

anyway, i kept thinking all day & really just for a while now of a bunch of stuff that i want/need to do, so i thought i could put up a list in here :]

wants/goals for winter break:

• clean room
• rearrange room
• reorganize my corkboard
  
• clean bathroom
• paint my school tote bag
• get in some leisurely reading
• establish some sort of exercise routine (DDR!? :P)
  

wants/goals for life in general:

• read the whole Bible
• strengthen my faith
• take up piano again
• feel genuinely good about my life & myself :]

yep yep. i feel like there was more than that, but i can't think of anymore right now. anyway, i'm pretty excited still about the semester being over & winter break & potentially more hangout time & all that jazz. also, i am uber excited about my christmas present that i am just so anxious to use alreadyyy. i've got some like, picture ideas in my head, and it makes me feel artistic again, only this time i'm not all emo over some guy who broke up with me, aha. sony cybershot dsc-w80. woo, what a delight x]

night owl much?

My mom's right, staying up this late can't be good for me, haha.
So it's one in the morning, & I find myself actually not all that sleepy, but I have six and a half hours to sleep until I ought to get up & shower & prep myself for church. So even though I'm not particularly sleepy, hopefully my body is tired enough to pass out once I fall into bed. :P

Update on my life's events:
last night (Friday) I participated in an amazingly fun game of floor hockey, without hardly any particular rules. What a blast. xD The people I know are pretty awesome :]
that game has left me sore, but it was well worth it. Exercise AND tons of fun, woo!
I'm wondering if maybe during Christmas break I can get in some sort of established routine with DDR.. that could be beneficial to my health, seeing as I have been for all my life, physically unfit, as far as I can tell. xD

So this upcoming week is going to be pretty busy, but I'm looking forward to it - not so much the taking-final-exams part, but I think I'll be ready for them. (I hope so, anyway). I've been progressively studying through this last week, & I'll be doing some more tomorrow & most likely the next couple days after. Wednesday brings a conclusion to the final exams, as well as the semester. Yay for a successful first college semester! Well, I suppose I should wait to say that once I finish with the exams & get my grades & all. But I feel that thus far my college experience has been.. fruitful? (That sounds like a good word to use but doesn't quite feel right, haha.)
Anyway, what I mean is, it's been fun. Crazy busy, emotionally-driven (not really directly related to school, but hey, it's my life), but pretty fun all the same. My classes weren't atrocious, I've met pretty cool people at work & I do generally enjoy my job, so yeah, all in all, good semester experience in my book. Especially since I haven't gotten into that whole college party/drinking scene. Gotta say, I love being straightedge. & I'm uber glad that my friends are, too, & that I can still see them around & hang out from time to time since we're all still in the county.

Alright, alright.
Sore floor hockey fun,
[oh yeah, side note. part of my first ever floor hockey experience was sliding to the ground thanks to gravity and quite an impact. so this guy josh & i were on opposing teams, so logically, we were going in opposite directions. both of us are after the ball (serving as a hockey puck), running towards each other, hockey sticks out to thwack the ball. so in this process of running, we ram right into each other, and well, he's bigger than i am, & i remember feeling myself ram into his shoulder, and then i think i spun around & steadily lowered myself to the ground, legs flailing. i landed on my butt, legs spread out, facing the opposite direction and feeling quite dazed. i could feel my eyes water and it felt like the wind was knocked out of me, but i was quite amused all the same. my head felt like stuff had been rattled inside, like it was vibrating or something, but really, i was fine, just a little shook up is all. good times. :P]

okay, so again, trying to wrap this up:
sore floor hockey fun,
impending final exams & satisfactory semester completion,
bible study this week,
a plan to camwhore with kirsten on thursday,
followed by shopping with jessica & kirsten's christmas party on friday.
what fun, what funnn. i'm excited for winter break to commence! :]

change

we live and we learn
to take one step at a time,
there's no need to rush.
it's like learning to fly,
or falling in love.
it's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen
that we find the reasons why

one step at a time.

- "One Step at a Time" by Jordin Sparks

Routine is nice, it's stable.

but I think I'm ready for a change.
Even in just little things:
new hairstyle,
new room arrangement,
I've been planning those two for a while but haven't gotten around to it yet.
Sometimes my life feels really boring, but I know I'm really lucky to have it.
All of the people and things that I know and love make my life pretty wonderful.
I don't know if you can call it selfish, but I think I'm still waiting for something more.
I'm waiting for that something amazing, some life-defining.. thing that'll just make whatever crap I've been through in the past feel worthwhile to get at that meaningful point in my life.
I want to find my happily ever after, figure out what exactly I'm going to do with my life, and be satisfied with it.
I think it'd be really cool to be famous, perform or something, buuut.. I think I sort of lack in that talent department. Yeah, there's definitely downs to being famous, lack of privacy, rumors, crazed fans, but I dunno.. definitely seems like an amazing experience so long as you keep your head on right and don't get into all that bad stuff.
Anyway, it seems God has something smaller planned for me, I just don't know what yet. I'm eager to find out, though. Until I do, I'll just keep trying my best in school, and try to improve myself however I see fit.

So yup, right now, I've got some studying to do. I have this last upcoming week of normal classes left, and then the Monday thru Wednesday after that are final exams (wish me luck! :]). I think residences officially close for winter break on the 14th, so I'll probably still be working til then. I've been asked if I want to work some days over break, and sure, it'd be cool to have some extra money, but I do like my sleep-and-lounging-about-doing-nothing-in-particular time, so we'll see about that. :P

intro?

so i made this blogger thing last night, & i'm not 100% sure on what compelled me to do so.
honestly, i was bored, watching jonas brothers videos on youtube, & eventually ended up on their bassist greg garbo's blog, & iono, it just looked really fun :]

i mean i've had journals and xanga before, but i look back, & all that really was was teen angst. sure, there's still quite a bit of it around, but i'm trying to grow up. i'll always be a kid at heart (life's a bit more fun that way) but i think i can still be a kid while being a sensible person as well. ..not really sure if that's the right word to use, but i have the idea in my head of what i mean.

i'm starting this blog for myself.
no doubt i'll probably share this with my friends and whatnot eventually, but for now, i think i'll keep it to myself.
i want to set myself on a start to being more optimistic, learning to really appreciate my life & all i've been blessed with, and just.. iono, enjoying what i've got.
i'm a normal kid, nothing all too special (then again, we're all special in our own ways, right? i think i learned that from Barney the purple dinosaur as a youngen :P).
i'd love to be able to just naturally come up with something witty or profound to stick in here for the amusement of others as well as myself, to get some attention (hey, i'm human, hah) but yeah. i dunno. my objective right now is to strengthen my faith and appreciate what i've got.

time to get started :]